Foreword to A Gaucho Throws the I Ching
This book can be purchased HERE
Well, Habibis and Habibtis, as I sit here in the Hotel Don Bartolo in Espinar, Peru, the draft of the book you are about to read has been sent to my close friends and colleagues. The Rogue Scholar is currently aiding on the layout, good friend Zero HP Lovecraft who has provided crucial editorial assistance on the namesake story and of course The Minnetonka Safe Haven Project. I have also sent a copy to the Raw Egg Nationalist who is singlehandedly countering the NPR totebag crowd. The illustrious Gio Pennacchietti provided peerless cover art. It goes without saying that the White King himself the Bronze Age Pervert has an advance copy for endorsement. The shared attention of a group of men is the most powerful force in the universe. If you disagree, consider how much money is spent to watch men kick a ball around in a desert, or shoot it into a goal. Consider what the mission control room looked like in 1969. In your hands is the product of the shared attention of a small group of men with outsized powers of persuasion and communication, and I, Faisal, am merely the conduit.
Here in Espinar the elevation is 12 thousand feet, one of my compadres passed out as he exited the plane in Juliaca. I am ok but I did get nosebleeds the first few days. I’ve come to Peru on business, I have a venture here in Espinar to produce high quality Alpaca wool for sweaters, one of my clients is Kinloch Anderson (but I’ve said too much). I have another, more lucrative project to harvest vilca berries for cultivation in addition to molle. The molle, when mixed with corn, was fermented by the ancient Wari tribe as an alcoholic brew. The vilca berry, which has powerful hallucinatory effects, can be added to the molle cocktail, and since it is ingested, it is not as strong a journey as ayahuasca or other trendy hallucinogens. This venture should be wildly successful financially but also, we have larger goals, yes, yes. But maybe I will still keep this secret for the time being.
While here in Espinar I spent some time herding the alpacas with the local shepherds, it is a hard life up here Habibis. It’s above the tree line so agriculture is tough, you can only grow potatoes up here without irrigation; if you get to eat guinea pig it is a luxury. But one can scratch through as a shepherd, and it’s not so hard. You let the alpaca range and if you need to take a lunch break or a walk to clear head, no problem my friend just pile up some rocks about 3-4 feet high, put your little gaucho hat on top of the rocks, and as a result you have a little gaucho to watch over the alpaca while you take break. The alpaca won’t cross this little gaucho.
My friends, I wish I could be with each and every one of you, we can tell jokes and stories and maybe make plans together for you for the future. Until that day, I hope that this book can be the little gaucho that watches over you and keeps you safe, and maybe inspires you to great and glorious adventures!
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-Faisal Marzipan, December 2022